Archived October 2005 Rainy Day Thoughts2
(I have deleted from this archive the which were political and dated by their references to current events and left general political philosophy)
Aura: a distinctive atmosphere surrounding a given source, a luminous radiation. An invisible breath, emanation, or radiation. An electromagnetic field around objects.
Metaphysically some believe that we are surrounded not only by an aura that goes far beyond our bodies in some cases, but also a field of color that has meaning to who our inner being is and can show disease or malaise. There are various methods for measuring this field. The most economical one is not a literal photograph of the colors but energy measured and translated via a special camera into a photo of you and your colors. These can change to some degree over time and with mood.
Because of my own interest in metaphysics and questions about what is and is not true, seven years ago I went looking for a place to have such a photograph taken. I found it in the back of a small metaphysical bookstore. The booth looked like the kind you see sometimes in malls. You sit down inside, relax, put your hand on the sensors and voila. The first time I had this done, I have to admit I had hoped some spiritual colors would show up-- but got instead bright red, orange and a bit of gold. I was disappointed but the book explaining it did say those colors can be part of creativity (along with some less flattering interpretations). Although I am always drawn to red, I didn't much like the idea it was surrounding me. It did not look restful and I had hoped for something at the least a bit more serene.
A year and a half ago, just to see if maybe things had changed-- or the other photo had been wrong-- I gave it another try when I was at a metaphysical fair. Maybe a bit of blue or green? Nope. Well, there might be some purple if I squint...
This morning I was reminded of my aura colors when I took an online test that was supposed to determine how balanced I was between fire, water, wind and earth. By this time I was somewhat resigned and not overly surprised at the results. Dominant was fire (although earth and wind were close but water far behind) and there was that red-- this time in the guise of a ruby. The suggestion was to wear turquoise to cool off. (I used to wear a turquoise and silver bracelet all the time. Perhaps I need to do that again. Politics sure won't do it this week!)
For years I have gone through periods of time where I get dreams that are vivid, in story form, and applicable to either my life or creativity. I have dreamed story ideas, paintings, seen troubling options illustrated for their consequences and very much enjoyed the times of the vivid dreamworld.
The idea for this painting came from such a dream where the woman had feathers, was like a kachina or Isis and it led me to rereading who Isis was, some sketches and finally a couple of paintings that varied around the dream.
I believe it's important when I first wake to try to retrieve any dreams that are lingering and sometimes I lie for a few moments putting together the stories, the colors and any images that are clear. Most times there is nothing important to remember. This week I had ones I call medicine dreams (as in their meanings go beyond what I was doing and are for helping me). Two mornings I could remember the important aspects but not today. Although I remembered it when I first woke, by the time clear awareness came, it was gone. All I know for sure is it was negative and not sure why I lost it. The earlier dreams illustrated current life situations-- one night being full of barriers which I have been feeling a lot in my life and the world at large.
Sometimes without any help I can come up with the meanings of the dreams but other times by looking in a dream dictionary I can consider meanings that would not have been obvious to me. I went looking for that site after the night I dreamed of a skyscraper, elevator, dragon, and a couple of other symbols that were not part of my regular life and seemed odd to be in my dream. I live a certain kind of rural life that normally is used in dream illustrations. I have come to believe for the most part that in my dreams the people in them aren't as critical to the meaning as what happened. I think my subconscious uses whoever is handy to illustrate the needed lessons. Although I do not, as some do, keep a journal alongside my bed to write down everything, usually in the morning when I am up, I do write down the gist of the dreams as only a few will I remember well years later.
The dream dictionary was a helpful source when I had a dream where I was going to jump from a rocky ledge into bright red, molten lava and then opted to decide that would hurt too much and reconsidered it with instead throwing myself in the cool blue of a beautiful ocean. Both were symbolic of optional ways of solving life problems and actually could be figured out for myself if I stopped to think-- anger vs peace.
I have never had truly prophetic dreams but I often have very illustrative ones of what is going on with my life, and I try to remember and use them.
Sometimes
words do not add to the moment--
Much as I love words.
When looking at the colors of autumn,
seeking reflections in the creek,
I did so silently.
The stillness of a leaf hitting the water,
a bird landing and leaving as quickly,
that was all there was.
Autumn is a time
of stillness on the land,
a time of going underground,
of leaving for some.
Of waiting for others,
a time of being...
********************************************************************
The new hay barn is going up slowly but the rains are making it hard. The pastures need the rain; so I can't complain but it hasn't made it so much fun for those doing the building. My part has just been taking photos of the stages as it rises.
Like anything we want to change in life, it required first ge
tting rid of what was in the way, then leveling the space, staking out the ground. Only then can holes go in the ground for the beams that will support the roof. Trusses came in prebuilt on a huge truck with a derrick to unload them where desired, then a log truck loader to lift them to the beams. Next will come the rafters and only then the gravel for the floor and the metal roof.
When building a barn, eveything has to be done in order or nothing would happen. Why do we exp
ect in our lives to skip over the steps and go right to the finished product?
One of the pluses to having raised our children in a rural setting was the teaching of consequences of not doing something-- can be life or death to an animal if they ignore chores. And the way that we prepare ground for what we hope to grow or build.
My garden looks nothing like this right now. It is at the sad, end of the season stage-- the flowers kind of drooping their heads with the combination of rain, wind and now some freezing, the vegetable garden has been neglected and needs to have the sheep come in to further its destruction. I know I should get out there and pull the plants that will no longer produce, trim back the deadheads on the roses, and if the rain stops long enough, till the vegetable garden up for next spring. I could with sufficient energy even plant a fall garden of lettuce but not sure I'll do any of that. The big if is the rain stops long enough. We'll see. right now I am watching the oak leaves accumulate on the deck and beds and know that has to be the first priority to get off as they will stifle the healthy soil and plants under them.
I see this a lot like my internal garden right now-- a metaphor for it. Yesterday I had a psychic reading from someone who describes herself as a trance medium. I am still mulling over whether I think it was all the real thing-- depending on what you think the real thing would be. It was a lot of things I know but nothing I could say only came from the spiritual realm. On the other hand, the fact I know it and have been trying to avoid it does not mean it didn't either. It was basically a pretty enjoyable hour spent discussing issues that are troubling me.
I have had an interest in going to psychics for about 6 years or so. It was part of my stepping out of my comfort zone as so many other things were at that time. I believe there are legitimate mediums and psychics but I also know it can be forced and determining what is real and what is not can be tricky. I go with the idea of listening and assessing and without the belief they can provide the magic pill to fix everything. This reading was no exception.
I asked about an ideal day that I wrote about at the beginning of 2000, that I have made collages showing what I want in my life, but that I have not moved to actually claim for assorted reasons. I may never as the psychic rather told me which barriers that stand between me and that day, and will I really overcome them? Not sure about that either. Weeds in my own garden.
There is a stage of life where everything looks so perfect, so clean and fresh with promise of everything flowering and producing and then there is a stage where if you didn't keep the work up, suddenly you are overwhelmed with weeds. I should take a picture of how my outside gardens look in early fall. Then again maybe I should not as my goal is to inspire myself to take care of things, to fix them, to move ahead, not to ever look back with regrets. It's too easy to dwell. It's not easy at all to start pulling weeds and replanting.
Monday, October 31, 2005
auras
Aura: a distinctive atmosphere surrounding a given source, a luminous radiation. An invisible breath, emanation, or radiation. An electromagnetic field around objects.
Metaphysically some believe that we are surrounded not only by an aura that goes far beyond our bodies in some cases, but also a field of color that has meaning to who our inner being is and can show disease or malaise. There are various methods for measuring this field. The most economical one is not a literal photograph of the colors but energy measured and translated via a special camera into a photo of you and your colors. These can change to some degree over time and with mood.
Because of my own interest in metaphysics and questions about what is and is not true, seven years ago I went looking for a place to have such a photograph taken. I found it in the back of a small metaphysical bookstore. The booth looked like the kind you see sometimes in malls. You sit down inside, relax, put your hand on the sensors and voila. The first time I had this done, I have to admit I had hoped some spiritual colors would show up-- but got instead bright red, orange and a bit of gold. I was disappointed but the book explaining it did say those colors can be part of creativity (along with some less flattering interpretations). Although I am always drawn to red, I didn't much like the idea it was surrounding me. It did not look restful and I had hoped for something at the least a bit more serene.
A year and a half ago, just to see if maybe things had changed-- or the other photo had been wrong-- I gave it another try when I was at a metaphysical fair. Maybe a bit of blue or green? Nope. Well, there might be some purple if I squint...
This morning I was reminded of my aura colors when I took an online test that was supposed to determine how balanced I was between fire, water, wind and earth. By this time I was somewhat resigned and not overly surprised at the results. Dominant was fire (although earth and wind were close but water far behind) and there was that red-- this time in the guise of a ruby. The suggestion was to wear turquoise to cool off. (I used to wear a turquoise and silver bracelet all the time. Perhaps I need to do that again. Politics sure won't do it this week!)
Thursday, October 27, 2005
Personal Power
This week the oak leaves drift down like a heavy rain, or more like crunchy, golden snowflakes. Standing at the window, I hear them landing. I wish I could photograph their fall, but I have tried in the past. It never shows in a photo. Their dropping is one of those moments you hold in your memory but cannot save. I look up wondering how many more? Some of the big branches look almost bare but on others the leaves are holding on.
My mind is drifting along with the leaves. Listening to the news earlier, I kept thinking of the image thing and how far astray it has often led a people-- not just this country. I think one of the reasons we go for these strong images, desire them to be our leaders, even when their actions sometimes end destructive to our own best interests, is our lack of personal power. Without power not only do we seek it from others, but we don't recognize it and end up being sucked in by slick advertising schemes, catch phrases, or charismatic speakers.
The Wizard of Oz showed the process so clearly. Dorothy wanted someone to get her home and she decided to go looking for someone powerful. Each person along her way had some power but not enough. But the Wizard of Oz, they told her, he had it all. If she could get find him, her problem would be solved; then she found out the nasty truth we often do when we have gone on this kind of search. The power sounded impressive. There were all the bells and whistles, the show, but behind the curtain was no wizard but just a weak, little old man. Dorothy was left with what she should have gone for to begin-- finding her own power.
I am tossing around a lot of my thoughts here, and they likely don't all fit together. I believe power is being able to discern what is real in the world and find our place within that. It is looking at options and being capable of coming up with a plan to get from A to C without being distracted by Z. Power means developing our own muscles in various ways from physically, spiritually, emotionally, to mentally. It is accepting what we cannot change but changing what we can. True power stands on its word, is honorable and doesn't deceive others. It faces barriers, between it and wise goals, straight on without wavering.
Real power is from within and is not dependent on our physical surroundings or other people. When you have power from within, even if you are living in a shanty, you will have balance, alignment with what is real, peace, serenity, appreciation for life, joy. You can effectively clear the garbage from your life to see what is essential to you.
We gain power by exercising whatever amount we have. Just as we make our muscles stronger by using them; so it's true of all types of power. Sure we might make mistakes and end up with some backtracking but we will not gain strength without using what we have. Ideally it should be used wisely. That comes from sound principles undergirding it, but even then it won't always be wise. Powerful people learn from the mistakes also and do better the next time. If we constantly look for someone else to fix things for us whether that's a pastor, teacher, government or family, we won't make ourselves strong.
Can we recognize power in someone else? More likely when we have it for ourselves.
When we begin to build our own personal power, we will be leading our lives as we choose-- not following someone else's agenda. We will seek spiritual and political leaders based on their power and the policies we believe are best-- not what hat they are wearing.
Image
This week-end, I watched two John Wayne films out of those recently released on DVD. The best was Hondo. It had all the ingredients-- love, discussions of the importance of honesty, courage, more realistic Native Americans, a clear depiction of the need sometimes to change, stirring soundtrack, big sky, desert landscapes; and of course, John Wayne as a powerful figure for right. As did a lot of his films, there was a strong female lead. There are a lot of good reasons to watch the Wayne films as you never have to worry if the good guy will win. Mostly they leave the viewer a satisfied feeling when they end.
There are also some problems with them if you look deeper. One is that we can mistake image for reality. John Wayne walked or rode onto the screen and instantly you knew he could not only be trusted to be who he said he was but that he could take care of whatever had gone wrong. Might take him some time, but he'd get you there. This is great for entertainment but what happens when you take it into real life?
Politically you can end up with the need for politicians to have an image that people vote for more than the actual man. Some is due to the need for instant sound bites and the American people's lack of patience with serious messages. They want to feel good and a lengthy discussion of policy isn't going to cut it. So you get a guy who looks good in a Stetson, wears cowboy boots, buys himself a ranch, rides around in a pickup, cuts brush (never mind if it would've been better off not being cut), and you got a cowboy. It doesn't matter if he doesn't have a cow, has no idea which side of the horse to mount from. He presents the image, and what does cowboy mean to Americans? Well John Wayne for one but also the settling of the West, righting wrongs, a code of ethics, a man of his word. Was Bush all that? He didn't have to be to get elected. Nobody would go deep enough in his past record to find out if that was an image he had lived up to. That takes too long and isn't fun. People, including reporters, get carried away with image. It satisfies something in us.
John Kerry also wanted an image-- war hero, intellect, policy wonk, United States Senator, duck hunter? Hmmmmm none of those worked. What could he find? He never did find one that connected with the American people and hence lost an election.
John Kerry also wanted an image-- war hero, intellect, policy wonk, United States Senator, duck hunter? Hmmmmm none of those worked. What could he find? He never did find one that connected with the American people and hence lost an election.
This goes beyond politics to who we trust in our personal lives. A young girl goes to a bar, a guy has a square jaw, is cute, seems nice and she trusts him. What he truly is she has no idea as she barely knows him. It's all about image and Ted Bundy projected a good looking guy until he got the girl in his power when what he truly was became obvious and it was too late.
The other problem with some of the John Wayne films (much as I love 'em) is that they too often present a simplistic solution to problems-- either a fistfight or guns (if it's an uppity lady, spanking will do). It is fun to watch those films and I wait for the action like everybody else, but if we buy into that as a real solution, we will not only damage our personal lives (probably end up in jail) but also get talked into wars that have no real purpose beyond looking like we are at least doing something.
What's the answer to the image thing? I think mainly it's recognizing image when we see it and understanding it is superficial and an illusion which may or may not have substance behind it. Real heroes and villains don't come so conveniently packaged.
Dreams
For years I have gone through periods of time where I get dreams that are vivid, in story form, and applicable to either my life or creativity. I have dreamed story ideas, paintings, seen troubling options illustrated for their consequences and very much enjoyed the times of the vivid dreamworld.
The idea for this painting came from such a dream where the woman had feathers, was like a kachina or Isis and it led me to rereading who Isis was, some sketches and finally a couple of paintings that varied around the dream.
I believe it's important when I first wake to try to retrieve any dreams that are lingering and sometimes I lie for a few moments putting together the stories, the colors and any images that are clear. Most times there is nothing important to remember. This week I had ones I call medicine dreams (as in their meanings go beyond what I was doing and are for helping me). Two mornings I could remember the important aspects but not today. Although I remembered it when I first woke, by the time clear awareness came, it was gone. All I know for sure is it was negative and not sure why I lost it. The earlier dreams illustrated current life situations-- one night being full of barriers which I have been feeling a lot in my life and the world at large.
Sometimes without any help I can come up with the meanings of the dreams but other times by looking in a dream dictionary I can consider meanings that would not have been obvious to me. I went looking for that site after the night I dreamed of a skyscraper, elevator, dragon, and a couple of other symbols that were not part of my regular life and seemed odd to be in my dream. I live a certain kind of rural life that normally is used in dream illustrations. I have come to believe for the most part that in my dreams the people in them aren't as critical to the meaning as what happened. I think my subconscious uses whoever is handy to illustrate the needed lessons. Although I do not, as some do, keep a journal alongside my bed to write down everything, usually in the morning when I am up, I do write down the gist of the dreams as only a few will I remember well years later.
The dream dictionary was a helpful source when I had a dream where I was going to jump from a rocky ledge into bright red, molten lava and then opted to decide that would hurt too much and reconsidered it with instead throwing myself in the cool blue of a beautiful ocean. Both were symbolic of optional ways of solving life problems and actually could be figured out for myself if I stopped to think-- anger vs peace.
I have never had truly prophetic dreams but I often have very illustrative ones of what is going on with my life, and I try to remember and use them.
Reflections on autumn
Sometimes
words do not add to the moment--
Much as I love words.
When looking at the colors of autumn,
seeking reflections in the creek,
I did so silently.
The stillness of a leaf hitting the water,
a bird landing and leaving as quickly,
that was all there was.
Autumn is a time
of stillness on the land,
a time of going underground,
of leaving for some.
Of waiting for others,
a time of being...
********************************************************************
Saturday, October 15, 2005
Building
The new hay barn is going up slowly but the rains are making it hard. The pastures need the rain; so I can't complain but it hasn't made it so much fun for those doing the building. My part has just been taking photos of the stages as it rises.
Like anything we want to change in life, it required first ge
tting rid of what was in the way, then leveling the space, staking out the ground. Only then can holes go in the ground for the beams that will support the roof. Trusses came in prebuilt on a huge truck with a derrick to unload them where desired, then a log truck loader to lift them to the beams. Next will come the rafters and only then the gravel for the floor and the metal roof.When building a barn, eveything has to be done in order or nothing would happen. Why do we exp
ect in our lives to skip over the steps and go right to the finished product?One of the pluses to having raised our children in a rural setting was the teaching of consequences of not doing something-- can be life or death to an animal if they ignore chores. And the way that we prepare ground for what we hope to grow or build.
Thursday, October 13, 2005
movies
Some people watch a film and it's all about enjoyment. They never expect a message. I can't say every film has a message, but some have strong, spiritual ones-- negative or positive. They can be entertaining while teaching something about life or maybe what we wish life could be. My favorite spirit films are not hitting me over the head with their message. It is entwined in the story. Two people could watch that film and one would have an enjoyable two hours, the other come away with insights to apply to their life. Those two people could be the same person several years apart.
Through the years I have collected films I felt had spiritual messages for me. Not to say there aren't others like say Ben Hur that would speak to someone else but these are those that speak to me and where I live or want to live-- films I want to watch again. Fran mentioned in a comment that she had The Mission for that reason and I agree with her-- so many spiritual messages in that one film. Movies can be today's mythology. I have more I want to own but the following are in my DVD library with the general reasons why I feel they are of value spiritually. They are in no particular order of importance.
This first is in its own category as I don't own another one that is similar to it: What the bleep do we know? Its story vehicle is a woman searching for life meaning but that's purely a frame to stretch over various considerations of what life is really all about and what is our place in it. It flows fast, is beautiful to watch and, from what I have heard from friends, could be enjoyed at all levels of spiritual awareness. I don't know if it'd be offensive to fundamentalist Christians, maybe so as it does not present a religious view of life but it does present a powerful melding together of science and spirituality to show they are not opposed if you don't have an agenda to protect.
Then there come movies about what spiritual, emotional, and physical discipline can attain for us. They range from the supernatural possibilities-- Bulletproof Monk, Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon-- to The Last Samurai which is the about discipline and dedication to a spiritual tradition but no flying through trees.
What is possible in this earth? Can we really travel through time? are ghosts real? what is real? what can the mind achieve? Do we create our own reality? Some of these ideas are addressed in the following films: Field of Dreams, Frequency, What Dreams May Come, Dragonfly, Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind, Don Juan deMarco, Big Fish, and Groundhog Day. Are any of the stories these films depict really possible? If not to the extent they illustrate, what about to lesser degrees? to me they all are dealing with life truths to one degree or another withfantasy and imagination. I think maybe this is where The Secret of Roan Inish, Weeping Camel, and WhaleRider belong. Modern fairy tales, not set in alternate galaxies, just cultures more open to the supernatural invading real life-- whatever real life is. Carrying fantasy a step farther are: Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy, the Harry Potter, Star Wars, Star Trek, and Lord of the Rings series.
There are more I want to buy but haven't gotten yet. Hero was very supernatural in exploring what really happened, what was possible? I get busy with work, with life and sometimes have to make myself sit down and watch a movie but I remind myself they are healthy and bring into my life something from outside my experiences to enhance my understanding; and the more i expect from them, the more I receive.
I would be interested in learning other titles of spiritually oriented films. I have bought some of what mine because of someone telling me. Not all spiritually worthy films become popular or are even well known.
Through the years I have collected films I felt had spiritual messages for me. Not to say there aren't others like say Ben Hur that would speak to someone else but these are those that speak to me and where I live or want to live-- films I want to watch again. Fran mentioned in a comment that she had The Mission for that reason and I agree with her-- so many spiritual messages in that one film. Movies can be today's mythology. I have more I want to own but the following are in my DVD library with the general reasons why I feel they are of value spiritually. They are in no particular order of importance.
This first is in its own category as I don't own another one that is similar to it: What the bleep do we know? Its story vehicle is a woman searching for life meaning but that's purely a frame to stretch over various considerations of what life is really all about and what is our place in it. It flows fast, is beautiful to watch and, from what I have heard from friends, could be enjoyed at all levels of spiritual awareness. I don't know if it'd be offensive to fundamentalist Christians, maybe so as it does not present a religious view of life but it does present a powerful melding together of science and spirituality to show they are not opposed if you don't have an agenda to protect.
Then there come movies about what spiritual, emotional, and physical discipline can attain for us. They range from the supernatural possibilities-- Bulletproof Monk, Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon-- to The Last Samurai which is the about discipline and dedication to a spiritual tradition but no flying through trees.
What is possible in this earth? Can we really travel through time? are ghosts real? what is real? what can the mind achieve? Do we create our own reality? Some of these ideas are addressed in the following films: Field of Dreams, Frequency, What Dreams May Come, Dragonfly, Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind, Don Juan deMarco, Big Fish, and Groundhog Day. Are any of the stories these films depict really possible? If not to the extent they illustrate, what about to lesser degrees? to me they all are dealing with life truths to one degree or another withfantasy and imagination. I think maybe this is where The Secret of Roan Inish, Weeping Camel, and WhaleRider belong. Modern fairy tales, not set in alternate galaxies, just cultures more open to the supernatural invading real life-- whatever real life is. Carrying fantasy a step farther are: Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy, the Harry Potter, Star Wars, Star Trek, and Lord of the Rings series.
There are more I want to buy but haven't gotten yet. Hero was very supernatural in exploring what really happened, what was possible? I get busy with work, with life and sometimes have to make myself sit down and watch a movie but I remind myself they are healthy and bring into my life something from outside my experiences to enhance my understanding; and the more i expect from them, the more I receive.
I would be interested in learning other titles of spiritually oriented films. I have bought some of what mine because of someone telling me. Not all spiritually worthy films become popular or are even well known.
Sunday, October 09, 2005
The Mission
"If might is right, then love has no place in the world. It may be so, it may be so. But I don't have the strength to live in a world like that, Rodrigo." Gabriel from a scene in The Mission
We decided to watch The Mission last night. Brief synopsis-- dedicated Jesuit priests, with the message of Jesus and love, attempt to reach and help primitive tribe in South America. They succeed which threatens the establishment, and the establishment strikes back. The film was made about 20 years ago, and when I first saw it, I was in a totally different life place, but it struck me powerfully then as now. I have to add-- everything depressing about it then is more so today. I only thought I knew what greed and people who put their personal desire for power above all else meant when I first saw this film. I only thought I'd seen people who justified their abuses by it's for the best (some even use God as their justification). Do humans ever stop abusing each other? Ever reach a point where they have enough wealth? Ever stop to think that someone else's life matters too? How did the message of Jesus get so lost? I don't know what it'll take to reach a point where the world will see where it's going and change its ways. Not to say the film only showed ugliness. Where there was evil depicted, there was also love and a desire to do good-- a willingness to die for a creed and a sense of what God wanted. It's the kind of selflessness that we see and some of us admire while others think-- now what did that achieve?
This has been my week to consider spiritual questions of purpose. First was the trance medium's reading, then came Sacred Ordinary October 7th about The Power of the wounded Healers with some powerful words; finally The Mission, where I had forgotten the plot but serendipitously, it turned out to be about a wounded healer. I often see such patterns and my dreams will follow suit with them.
To watch The Mission, is hard. You keep hoping (as we do often in life) that somewhere, someone will realize what they're doing and stop it; but even when they do, it does not change anything. Nor does it today as our abuse of aboriginal peoples is ongoing. Only this summer I read about a tribe in South America being badly impacted by the spraying of the forest in which they live-- the excuse being to stop production of cocaine by drug traffickers.
In this film, there was no release from the feeling of frustration at what men will do to others-- how soulless some can become. The perpetrators in this film never see what they are doing as wrong. At the end of the film, as the three men responsible for what was done discuss it, one said, "You had no alternative, Your Eminence. We must work in the world. The world is thus."
The Cardinal, who knew he had condoned murdering spirituality to maintain power for his religion, said, "No, senhor Hontar. Thus have we made the world. Thus have I made it"
And thus we do. All of us-- for good or ill. We need to stop and think what are we contributing to either chaos or love?
We decided to watch The Mission last night. Brief synopsis-- dedicated Jesuit priests, with the message of Jesus and love, attempt to reach and help primitive tribe in South America. They succeed which threatens the establishment, and the establishment strikes back. The film was made about 20 years ago, and when I first saw it, I was in a totally different life place, but it struck me powerfully then as now. I have to add-- everything depressing about it then is more so today. I only thought I knew what greed and people who put their personal desire for power above all else meant when I first saw this film. I only thought I'd seen people who justified their abuses by it's for the best (some even use God as their justification). Do humans ever stop abusing each other? Ever reach a point where they have enough wealth? Ever stop to think that someone else's life matters too? How did the message of Jesus get so lost? I don't know what it'll take to reach a point where the world will see where it's going and change its ways. Not to say the film only showed ugliness. Where there was evil depicted, there was also love and a desire to do good-- a willingness to die for a creed and a sense of what God wanted. It's the kind of selflessness that we see and some of us admire while others think-- now what did that achieve?
This has been my week to consider spiritual questions of purpose. First was the trance medium's reading, then came Sacred Ordinary October 7th about The Power of the wounded Healers with some powerful words; finally The Mission, where I had forgotten the plot but serendipitously, it turned out to be about a wounded healer. I often see such patterns and my dreams will follow suit with them.
To watch The Mission, is hard. You keep hoping (as we do often in life) that somewhere, someone will realize what they're doing and stop it; but even when they do, it does not change anything. Nor does it today as our abuse of aboriginal peoples is ongoing. Only this summer I read about a tribe in South America being badly impacted by the spraying of the forest in which they live-- the excuse being to stop production of cocaine by drug traffickers.
In this film, there was no release from the feeling of frustration at what men will do to others-- how soulless some can become. The perpetrators in this film never see what they are doing as wrong. At the end of the film, as the three men responsible for what was done discuss it, one said, "You had no alternative, Your Eminence. We must work in the world. The world is thus."
The Cardinal, who knew he had condoned murdering spirituality to maintain power for his religion, said, "No, senhor Hontar. Thus have we made the world. Thus have I made it"
And thus we do. All of us-- for good or ill. We need to stop and think what are we contributing to either chaos or love?
Weeds in the Garden
My garden looks nothing like this right now. It is at the sad, end of the season stage-- the flowers kind of drooping their heads with the combination of rain, wind and now some freezing, the vegetable garden has been neglected and needs to have the sheep come in to further its destruction. I know I should get out there and pull the plants that will no longer produce, trim back the deadheads on the roses, and if the rain stops long enough, till the vegetable garden up for next spring. I could with sufficient energy even plant a fall garden of lettuce but not sure I'll do any of that. The big if is the rain stops long enough. We'll see. right now I am watching the oak leaves accumulate on the deck and beds and know that has to be the first priority to get off as they will stifle the healthy soil and plants under them.
I see this a lot like my internal garden right now-- a metaphor for it. Yesterday I had a psychic reading from someone who describes herself as a trance medium. I am still mulling over whether I think it was all the real thing-- depending on what you think the real thing would be. It was a lot of things I know but nothing I could say only came from the spiritual realm. On the other hand, the fact I know it and have been trying to avoid it does not mean it didn't either. It was basically a pretty enjoyable hour spent discussing issues that are troubling me.
I have had an interest in going to psychics for about 6 years or so. It was part of my stepping out of my comfort zone as so many other things were at that time. I believe there are legitimate mediums and psychics but I also know it can be forced and determining what is real and what is not can be tricky. I go with the idea of listening and assessing and without the belief they can provide the magic pill to fix everything. This reading was no exception.
I asked about an ideal day that I wrote about at the beginning of 2000, that I have made collages showing what I want in my life, but that I have not moved to actually claim for assorted reasons. I may never as the psychic rather told me which barriers that stand between me and that day, and will I really overcome them? Not sure about that either. Weeds in my own garden.
There is a stage of life where everything looks so perfect, so clean and fresh with promise of everything flowering and producing and then there is a stage where if you didn't keep the work up, suddenly you are overwhelmed with weeds. I should take a picture of how my outside gardens look in early fall. Then again maybe I should not as my goal is to inspire myself to take care of things, to fix them, to move ahead, not to ever look back with regrets. It's too easy to dwell. It's not easy at all to start pulling weeds and replanting.
posted by Rain Trueax at 10:33 AM
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